Sarcasm, the Darts of Destruction

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So many people like to deliver messages couched in Sarcasm. It’s a very common thing.
Most sarcasm is delivered with humor, a joke or off-handed remark. The thinking is that the message will be received better that way. The deception is that although people may be laughing on the outside, there may be damage done on the inside.

Like darts of destruction they hit our heart and smolder within. The darts are quick but sharp, while within the bitterness and self-doubt linger.

“Hey Joe, don’t work too hard!” the boss yells in the presence of other employees. They all laugh. Joe might even chuckle a little. The message is clear, the boss thinks you’re lazy and now has communicated it not only to you but the other employees as well.

“I don’t have all day!” or “I’m not getting any younger!” You don’t do things fast enough. Although, you may be a thinker or a plodder it’s clear, he doesn’t care, he wants results now.

“Wow, you haven’t missed a meal!” You’re battle with eating has gotten the best of you and you’re overweight, you know that, so why does she have to point that out.

A man overheard two coworkers say about him, “Well, you know, he’s not exactly the sharpest tool in the shed.” They think you’re stupid.
Often sarcasm is delivered in the heat of the moment, and your frustration is leaked out without thinking about it. You didn’t mean it to hurt, but you did want to deliver the message.

The recipient of sarcasm often spirals downward, thinking less of themselves, losing confidence, and as a result performing worse not better. The self-fulfilling prophecy wins out.

In the meantime, bitterness grows toward the one delivering the message, whether it be a boss, coworker, or friend. And bitterness rarely yields respect and admiration. It is the seeds of destruction of a relationship.

If you want to motivate, encourage. If you want to yield better results, train. If you want to maximize people, find their strengths and put them where they can be strong. And, if you want to communicate concern, do it with love; because sarcasm doesn’t work.


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